©KERRANG!
So, it is with the greatest confidence that Chino Moreno, Stephen Carpenter,
Abe Cunningham,Chi Cheng and Frank Delgado pull up a pew in a plush hotel
room and prepare to ask each other the type of questions they’ve, until now,
avoided. Gentleman, the Kerrang! Truth Or Dare challenge awaits you…
Stephen: “Alright Chino, what’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done in bed?”
Chino: “Shit, I’ve gotta be serious here? Damn, I think it’s when
I’ve tapped that ass. Yeah, I’m talking about the forbidden: anal sex.
That’s about it, nothing too crazy.”
Chino: “Abe, who would play me in a movie about the Deftones?”
Abe: “Easy, Martin Short. Oh, who would play you?
That’s easy too: Ralph Macchio.’
Chino: “Damn,’The Karate Kid’? You could have said Johnny Depp or something.”
Chi: “Frank. what’s the most unusual thing you’ve ever received in the post?”
Frank: “That would be my tax return forms all burnt up. Someone fire-bombed
the mailbox, so my shit was all charred when it reached me.”
Frank: “Airight Steph-dog, have you ever wanted to hit another member
of the band?”
Stephen: “Hell yeah, I’ve wanted to hit every one of you motherfuckers.
When? ‘White Pony’,Around The Fur’- for 11 years, basically.
It’s not like it’s just me, though, when we write songs we’re always arguing.
We’re always like,’Yo, why are you such a dick?’.”
Stephen: “What’s your favouiite swear word Chino?”
Chino: “Fllk! That’s the best one.”
Stephen: “What about c**t?”
Chino: “Fucking c**t is a good combination, too, as is motherfucker.’
Frank: “Bitch is cool. We like them all.’
Chino: “Abe, what am I like when I’m drunk?”
Abe: “You’re a silly boy when you get loose. You’re a fucking jack-ass.”
Chino: “My feminine side really comes out too, but actually Chi’s the best
drunk.”
Chi: “I look mad when I’m drunk, even if I’m not. My eyes get all googly
and shit and I have this crazy scowl on my face. I look like a mean drunk.”
Abe: “Chi, how many times do you masturbate each day?”
Chi: “it really depends on how much I’ve been drinking, but generally
not more than once. The more I drink, the less I masturbate.”
Frank: “Yeah, you might well injure yourself doing it when you’re
intoxicated.”
Chi: “At home I’ve got my lady, so I dont bother.”
Chino: “I always masturbate when Im at home. Im like, (mimicking
masterbation) You want some of this baby? and all spurt it all over her
tits or something. Somehow it seems like a waste of paste.”
Chi: “Whats the worst thing you’ve ever done to a woman Frank ?”
Frank: “Well I spat on a girl before but it was a long time ago and i
really hated her.”
Chino: ” Havent you ever peed on a girl ? It’s fun”
Frank: “Steph, do you think that I take too many drugs?”
Stephen.: ‘Frank, you’re coal on that one baby. You ain’t gonna catch
this guy with no toxins in him other than alcohol.”
Frank: “I smoke weed, but that’s not a drug.”
Stephen: “Mind you, it’s only because we haven’t been able to get any
proper drugs recently.”
Stephen: ‘Chino, what do I own that you detests?”
Chino: “Those shorts and your Rolex.’
Abe: “I reckon it’s the combination of the two together that makes it
so truly fucked up. I hate all your shit man. You can’t wear a Rolex
and dress like that.’
Chino: “Stephen’s always buying new stuff, like digital cameras, watches or
calculators and I swear he don’t use half of that shit. You’re a total
gadget-ass motherfucker!”
Steph: ‘Hey, I be using that shit.”
Chino: “Abe, do you dislike any of my friends?”
Abe: “Yeah, I do actually. Although, there are people who I used to really
hate that I’ve learned to like as I’ve got older. Actually, I don’t
really hate anybody that much.”
Frank: “I do. I’m a loather.”
Abe: “Chi, could you murder someone and if so, who?”
Chi: ” I could murder someone, but I wouldn’t do it. It’s against my
principles.”
Stephen: “But your Buddhist principles are compromised on a daily basis
so just answer the question. It’s only hypothetical.”
Chi: “Anyone who harmed my friends or family I guess, but there’s no
one I feel that malicious towards.”
Stephen: “Well I can’t lie, sometimes I’ve just wanted to slay a fool.”
Chino: “Shut up! ”
Stephen: “For real. I know people I’d take out if I could.”
Chi: “Frank, what’s the worst song the Deftones have ever recorded?”
Frank: “It’s that one that Stephen wrote the lyrics for, what was it
called?’Booty Naked’? It’s one from the early days and it’s the only
Deftones demo that is not freely available. Everything else is out
there on the internet already. I think it’s our homies trying
to make money.”
Frank: “How big is your penis, Stephen?”
Chi: “Time for ‘Aesop’s Fables’- and measuring it from your sphincter
doesn’t count, okay?”
Stephen: “I’ll just say that it’s rather small because then anything
else is a bonus.”
Chino: “if anyone really wants to know, check out the public access
TV show ‘Colin’s Sleazy Friends’when we were on it, because Stephen
pulled out his dick and started working that thing like bubblegum.
I don’t know what he was thinking.
Tapioca pudding coming out of there and shit.’
Stephen: “I had the angry inch, yeah, but that monkey’s got girth.”
Stephen: “Chino, what’s my most inftating habit?”
Chino: “It’s the way you contradict yourself. You’re like a bakery that
constantly spews out shit cakes.”
Chino: “Abe, do you give money to beggars?”
Abe: ” No, fuck that. If they didn’t want to be poor then they
shouldn’t have become a bum, right? I’m only kidding. Sometimes a guy
just wants to go get a beer, so I’ll occasionally give them something.”
Abe: “Chi, who’s the smolliest person in the hand?”
Chi: “That’s a piece of cake: I’m by far the smelliest motherfucker
in any band. I’ve heard that the bassist from Corrosion Of Conformity
is pretty smelly, but he can’t be as bad as me. I fucking stink.’
Chi: “Frank. what do I keep saying that really gets on your tits?”
Frank: “That you’re a Buddhist, how about that?”
Frank: “Stephen, have you ever had a crush on another man?”
Stephen: “No.”
Chino: (after the band have stopped laughing hystericallo: “You were
a bit quick in answering there.”
Stephen: “But I’ve really just never had a crush on a guy.
Come on, next question.”
Stephen: “Do you got off an porn Chino?”
Chino: “Who me? Yeah motherfucker, I love porn. I just bought me a
‘Gallery’ magazine to read on the plane.”
Stephen: “That’s not porn, that’s just naked girls.’
Chino: “Well I’ve also got porn that Chi bought me for my 19th birthday.
Most of all, though, I like to go and see the live stuff where you sit
in the booth and drop a coin in the slot. I like the lusty ladies because
it’s a seedy trip.”
Chino: “Abe, do you believe in the death penalty?”
Abe: “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.”
Chino: ‘But haven’t you seen ‘Dead Man Walking’? That shit’s fucking
ruthless and it certainly made me think again.”
Stephen: “I believe that your fate should be handed over to the
victim’s family because generally people are nice and they’ll choose
a suitable punishment.
Otherwise, once you’re a victim you’ll be victimised through the whole
cycle and never be satisfied that justice was served.”
Chino: “I still believe that everyone deserves a second chance.”
Abe: “Chi, what’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever
done while drunk?”
Chi: “Just about everything really, although there was that time
when I punched out the windshield of a car I was driving. I also tried
to throw one of our techs out of the tour bus window when he attempted
to put Def Leppard on the stereo. Another time I was messed up on
mushrooms and I threw this monster sports bag across the room and it
knocked this girl right off her chair. Boom! That thing was huge.”
Chi: “Frank. which member of the band do you socialise with
the most and why?”
Frank: “I kick it with Steph the most because of his weed.”
Frank. “Have I ever hurt your feelings, Steph?”
Stephen: “No, never. You never have anything mean to say about anybody.
You’re like the Deftones’ little Buddha which is kind of cool considering
you just said you loath a lot of people.”
Stephen: “Chino, what do you call me behind my baw?”
Chino. “The same shit I be saying right to your face, bro: jack-ass…”
Frank. ‘Down-time.”
Chi: “Lunch break.’
Abe. ‘Fllk-face.’
Chino: “Abe, what de you hate most about me?”
Abe. “I’m a lover, not a hater
Abe: “Chi, whats your biggest regret?”
Chi: “I don’t have any. I’m pretty okay right now and I think
that every fucked-up thing that I did in the past was just something
that I did to get where I am today.’ Chi. “Frank. what did you think
of me when we first met?”
Frank. “I don’t think I thought anything, I just hated the way
that you smelled.”
Frank. “Out of IO, how good are you in bed, Steph-dog?”
Stephen: ” I know I’ve never been a 1O.”
Chino. “But you’re a good kisser. My wife knows this girl who Steph
kicks it with and she’s always talking about him, saying he’s a good
kisser and shit, so he’s got to be doing something right.”
Stephen: “Chino, what is my most Fuckin revolting physical defect?”
Chino: ‘It’s what we call your Little Cyster, that fucked-up cyst
on your back. You’ve had that motherfucker on and off for years!”
Frank: “Yeah, one year that boil was bulging, it must be like a
seasonal thing. It needs a damn good lancing.”
Chino: “OK. final question and this is for all you motherfuckers,
when was the last time y’all upset your mothers?”
Stephen: “The last time I was at home I burst in and woke up my
mother by shouting,’What’s up?’, when she was sleeping. I hadn’t
seen her for ages.”
Chino: “I made my mom sad the other day because I wasn’t paying
attention. I said something and next thing I knew she was walking
out to her car and she was crying. I totally fucking hurt her
feelings even though I was only joking. I guess she thought that
I didn’t care or something.’
Abe: “My mother wanted tickets to see us on David Letterman’s
show and I wasn’t even sure whether it was confirmed, so I said,’Yo,
I told you it wasn’t even confirmed!’, and she was pissed because
I snapped at her.’
Stephen: “Shit, you’re keeping your own mother from meeting Letterman?
You heartless bastard…’
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